Friday, June 28, 2013

Simplify, Simplify

hey there! 

I received a message from someone else, then I logged in to read that message. But, before I read it, I saw your picture, and for some reason I felt I want to go through your profile :) 
You have an interesting and unique profile! I really liked it. Plus, you have beautiful eyes ;) 

Anyways, here I'm writing this message, and I forgot to even read the other message from the other person, haha... I guess that message brought me here to find you! 

Waiting to see your reply...

hey there!

i'm desireable.  you're interesting and pretty!

fate has brought us together through a website with thousands of people looking to meet someone.

did you buy any of this bullshit?

Monday, June 24, 2013

Girl, you're a beautiful artist...

this is the start of one of those spoken word breakdowns in the middle of a New Kids on the Block song, right? 

Thursday, June 13, 2013

Happy Birthday to Me!

Let's get married

Great message for my 28th birthday!  Thanks for the reminder that I'm still single!

Friday, June 7, 2013

Defensively Adventurous

Hi. We have stuff in common. Yes... I did put "adventure" in my profile. Do you see that word a lot? I don't care. Yes, I like adventures. I like the craziness of them, ok?

I can only assume this is what he thinks is the imaginary other side of this conversation:

-Ugh, no we don't.  Did you put "adventure" in your profile?
-No, I never see that word because no one's dumb enough to use it.  It's fucking stupid.
-Do you mean to tell me that you actually like adventures?
-That's so lame.  What could you possibly like about adventures?

I'd Prefer a Smattering

Hi how ya doin? You garbed my attention and id love to know a bit more about you. I'm a 35 year old NYC firemen from Brooklyn. If you like tall dark n handsom with a touch of intelligence and ambition we should talk.

Looking for a bit more than "a touch" of intelligence.  Thanks anyway, though!

Monday, May 20, 2013

Poetry Corner

hello I think your Beautiful 
And I would like to get to know you 
I know my profile I'd blank but ill answer any ?'s 
I hope to hear from you

Today's poem is brought to you by autocorrect and loneliness.